Office Space
by Trunks6
Summary: A Day in the working life of Mickey Mouse employee of Walt Disney....
1. I Am Not A Pussy

Office Space:  
I Am Not A Pussy  
  
"Boy I'll Tell You Somedays..one of these days it's gonna be..." Mickey Started.  
  
Mickey then put his hands up making them look like a big machine gun.  
  
"DUUDUDUUD!" Mickey sounded, as if it were a real gun sound.  
  
Just then a waiter came by.  
  
"DUDUDUUD" He repeated jokingly.   
  
"So what can I get you gentlemen? Something to drink or something to nibble on? Some pizza shooters, Shrimp Poppers or Extreme Fiettas?" He asked.  
  
Mickey looked at him solomly.   
  
"Just coffee." Mickey ordered.  
  
"OK...sounds like a case of the Mondays." The waiter observed and he knocked on the table lightly with a smile. Then he left.  
  
Mickey looked at Goofy and Donald.  
  
"What if were....still doing this when were fifty?" Mickey asked them.  
  
"It would be nice to have that kind of job security." Donald answered.  
  
"Mortimer is gonna have me work on Saturday....Yep..I'm gonna end up doing it because I'm a big pussy...which is why I work at Disney in the first place." Mickey said.  
  
"Yeah well I work at Disney, and I'm not a pussy..." Goofy sneered.  
  
"Yes and I am also not a pussy!" Donald replied.  
  
"In fact they'll find out the hard way that I'm not a pussy if they don't start treating me better. I'll get a virus that will rip the company up big time." Donald explained.  
  
Just then Mickey saw the waitress that he had his eye on for some time.  
  
"Oh there she is!" Mickey said with his eyes going wide.  
  
Donald looked over his shoulder and Goofy looked at the waitress as well.  
  
"Mickey you always talk about this girl. If your so obsessed with her, why don't you ask her out?" Goofy asked.  
  
"Naw, I can't do that. I'm just another asshole customer, you can't just walk up to a waitress and ask her out." Mickey said.  
  
"Oh that reminds me, I'm not going to be able to play poker with you guys this weekend." Mickey remembered.  
  
"Why what's going on?" Goofy asked.  
  
"I'm going to see this occupational hypnotherapist with Anne." Mickey explained.  
  
"Dude, an occupational hypnotherapist!" Donald said in a suprised voice.  
  
"Yeah, Anne wants me to go. She thinks it might help...." Mickey's said as his voice sank.  
  
"You know I kinda get the feeling that she's cheating on me." Mickey said as he stared at his coffee.  
  
"Yeah I know what you mean." Donald replied.  
  
Mickey looked up and starred at Donald.  
  
"What's that supposed to mean!" Mickey asked with some shock in his voice.  
  
"Nothing!" Donald answered.  
  
"Why don't you just tell Anne that your not into hypnosis and you wanna play poker with us." Donald said.  
  
No, I can't do that, she'll get all pissed off and I think the guy might be able to help. I mean he did help Anne lose weight." Mickey replied in a glum state.  
  
"Mickey she's anorexic." Goofy explained.  
  
"Yeah I know. The Guy is really good."  
  
"Well, I don't think any occupational hypnotheropsis is gonna help solve any of your problems." Donald said.  
  
"And Speaking of problems what this I hear about you messing up on your TPS reports!" Donald accused.  
  
"Yeah, didn't you get that memo?" Goofy asked.   
  
To be continued..... 


	2. Simba's Advice

Office Space:  
Simba's Advice  
  
  
Mickey came in through the doorway of his appartment. And sat down on the couch with a depressed look on his face.  
  
"Hey Mickey Man!" Simba called through the walls.  
  
Mickey shuddered.  
  
"Check out Channel Nine, Check out this chick!" Simba called out again.  
  
"Dammit, Simba can't you just pretend that we can't hear eachother through the walls!" Mickey called back.  
  
"Oh sorry man, is Anne over there or something?" Simba called back.  
  
"NO!...Uh...If you want to talk to me...just come over." Mickey called back.  
  
Simba then got up and walked over to Mickey's Apartment on the other side next door.  
  
Simba closed the door with his tail.  
  
"Hey man!" Simba greeted Mickey.  
  
Simba then went over to the table in front of Mickey and got the remote with his teeth.   
  
"Check this out!" Simba said and changed the channel to Nine.  
  
There was a naked female black mouse with her chest exposed.  
  
"Oh Simba....." Mickey whined.  
  
"Oh sorry man I thought you'd wanna see this." Simba said.  
  
Simba looked back at the naked mouse on the TV.   
  
"Don't you think that mouse looks like Anne?" Simba asked.  
  
"Well....yeah...sort of." Mickey replied in a depressed state.  
  
"Hey she hasn't been over here in a while? You still going out with her?" Simba asked.  
  
"Yeah, I guess...sometimes I get the feeling that she's cheating on me or something." Mickey answered.  
  
"Yeah I get that feeling too man." Simba replied.  
  
"What makes you say that?" Mickey asked in a suprised voice.  
  
"I don't know man, I just get that feeling.....looking at her..that she's the type of chick that would just....huuh." Simba shuddered.  
  
But then he realized.  
  
"Oh sorry man, I'm just talking out of my ass..." Simba started to apologize.  
  
"No No...It's all right." Mickey said as he got up to go get a beer in the fridge.  
  
"I just had a ruff day that's all." Mickey explained as he got two beers out of the fridge.  
  
"Yeah tell me about it!" Simba agreed.  
  
"Ohhh..." Simba moaned as he climbed up on Mickey's couch and settled down.  
  
"I gotta wake my ass up everyday this week." Simba said.  
  
"I'm working on solving some of the more grueling problems facing the pridelands and they need more time to solve then others." Simba explained.  
  
"Let me ask you something...when you come in on monday and you're not feeling very well...does anyone say to you "Sounds like a case of the mondays?" Mickey asked.  
  
"No. NO Man. Shit NO Man. I Believe you'd get your ass kicked saying something like that man." Simab replied.  
  
"We still going fishing this weekend?" Simba asked.  
  
"Nah...Mortimer's gonna have me work on Saturday I just now it." Mickey said in a depressed voice.  
  
"Well You can get out of that easily." Simba started.  
  
"How?" Mickey asked.  
  
"Well, typically a boss will ask you to work on the weekends at the end of the week right? Simba asked as he got up and got his beer from Mickey.  
  
"Yeah." Mickey replied.  
  
"Well all you need to do is lay low the last few hours on Friday, get out early, turn off your answering machine, you should be home free man." Simba explained as he opened his bottle of beer with his paws and he headed back to the couch.   
  
"That's a really good idea!" Mickey said his spirits finally lifting.  
  
"Say Simba?" Mickey began as he walked back and sat in a chair beside the couch.  
  
"What would you do if you had a million dollars?" Mickey asked.  
  
"I'll tell you what I would do. Two lionesses at the same time." Simba replied.  
  
Mickey smiled.  
  
Simba's expression remained stern.  
  
"That's it? If you had a million dollars you'd do two lionesses at the same time." Mickey asked.  
  
"Damn straight I always wanted to do that man. I'd figure if I were a millionair, I could arrange that too, cause lionnesses dig lions with money." Simba explained.  
  
"Well not all lionesses." Mickey pointed out.  
  
"Just the ones that double up on lions like me." Simba replied.  
  
"Good point." Mickey said.  
  
"Well now what would you do?" Simba asked.  
  
"Besides two mice at the same time?" Mickey asked.  
  
"Well yeah." Simba replied.  
  
"Nothing." Mickey answered.  
  
"Nothing huh." Simba replied.  
  
"Yeah, I would relax, I would sit on my ass all day...I would do nothing." Mickey answered.  
  
"Well you don't need a million dollars to do nothing. Take a look at my Uncle. He's broke, don't do shit!" Simba pointed out.   
  
To Be Continued... 


End file.
